First, second and third person writing

The point of view or person you choose for your writing helps create your tone and perspective.

• First person writing uses 'I' and 'we'. 'I' writing is personal, but 'we' is often used collectively to refer to an organisation or group.
• With second person writing, you talk directly to your reader using 'you' language. The second person is used extensively in marketing material and also to provide information.
• Third person writing uses 'he', 'she', 'it' and 'they'. It is more formal than the first and second person and is often used in reports, policies and scholarly texts.

Most of us use the right person instinctively. But if you're stuck think about what you want to achieve and your audience.

Second person writing
There is an increasing trend, particularly in marketing writing, to use the second person extensively. It is powerful. 'You' language helps creates the sense that the writer is talking directly to you, so you feel engaged and involved. It's also a useful technique to help you, the writer, concentrate on what the reader wants to know rather than what you want to say. When people write in the second person their language is often more active and direct.

Third person writing
Third person writing is more authoritative and objective than first or second person writing. It's the language we're used to reading in our daily newspapers.

Third person writing is also more distant. This can be a disadvantage if you want to engage your reader, but an advantage if you're writing about negative topics, such as poor management, and don't want to imply that your reader is guilty (even if you know they are).

First person writing
'I' is personal and informal and is still not appropriate in a lot of business and marketing writing. But businesses of all sizes often use 'we' to personalise their services. For example, 'Discover what we're doing across the regions'.

Don't confuse your reader by switching person in the middle of a sentence. For example say:

After you attend a course, you must fill out an evaluation form.
or
After people attend a course, they must fill out an evaluation form.
Not
After a person attends a course, you must fill out an evaluation form.

For fun
There's a website that claims it can give you an instant indication of how customer-focused your website is. I'm sure it's based on how often you use the word 'you' compared with 'we'. Try it out and see how well you score!
http://www.futurenowinc.com/wewe.htm

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Writing referencing styles

The two main reference systems used in business writing are the author-date system and the documentary-note system. The Vancouver system, which is similar to the documentary-note system, is used in scientific writing. Many organisations develop their own referencing style based on either the author-date or documentary-note system.

Referencing within text

The author-date system, also known as the Harvard system, identifies in brackets the author’s name and date of publication.

     This study (Brown, 2008) demonstrates...

The documentary-note system uses endnotes or footnotes for references and comments.

     The study¹demonstrates...

Reference lists and bibliographies

People use the terms ‘reference list’ and ‘bibliography’ interchangeably. Both appear at the end of a document and are written in a similar manner, but a reference list documents all the works that were specifically referred to in the text, while a bibliography includes other works that were consulted as the document was being compiled.

The author-date and documentary-note system have several features in common:

• Books and periodical titles are italicised.
• Single quotation marks are used for article names and for chapters within books.
• Items within a reference are separated by commas (though there is no comma between the author and date in the author-date system).
• No full stops are used after authors’ initials.

The difference between the author-date and documentary-note systems lies in how the author’s name is written and in the position of the date of publication.

• In the author-date system, the author's first name or initials follows the family name, and is followed by the date.
• In the documentary-note system, the author's initials precede the family name, and the date is placed at the end of the citation.
• In the author-date system, the author’s first name or initials follows the family name, and is followed by the date.
• In the documentary-note system, the author’s initials precede the family name, and the date is placed at the end of the citation.

Examples of author-date references
Book: Flann, E, Hill, B 2004, The Australian Editing Handbook, 2nd edn, John Wiley & Sons, Milton.
Article: Tadros, E February 2009, ‘Shoppers log on for a bargain’, The Sun-Herald.

Examples of documentary-note references
Book: E Flann, B Hill, The Australian Editing Handbook, 2nd edn, John Wiley & Sons, Milton, 2004.
Article: Tadros, E, ‘Shoppers log on for a bargain’, The Sun-Herald, February 2009.

Page number references

When referring to page numbers in the body of a document, use page or pages. In references, abbreviate to p. for page or pp. for pages. Have a space between the abbreviation and the page number.

     There is more information on company fraud on page 98.
     Fraud (pp. 98–103) is a major contributor to the company’s losses.

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Writing endings

Often we concentrate on openings and fizzle out at the end, forgetting that some people read beginnings and endings first, and the final note is sometimes what sticks in the mind. With reports, I don't think it matters if a section ends abruptly, but with media articles and blogs, it does.

A clever ending
An example of a clever ending is quoted in Writing for Journalists by Sally Adams and Harriet Gilbert, Routledge, 1999. This article was written for Observer years ago, but the topic still has relevance today.

'BT is tightening up its telephone security system after its confidential list of ex-directory numbers was penetrated – by a woman from Ruslip.'

[She sold this data to newspapers and was eventually caught and convicted.]

'Last night the Observer was unable to contact [X] by telephone. She is ex-directory.

Writing tips

• Echo your introduction, but don't repeat it word for word.
• Make a strong, not a timid, statement – it can be positive or negative.
• Put the powerful words at the end in the 'punch' position.
   'It was my mother, cold and dead.' Dickens.

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Online apostrophe program launch

Online Writing Training has just launched its new apostrophe program – the fifth in the series. You only have to think back to Myer’s post-Christmas sale mistake last year to realise the importance of this little punctuation mark when it comes to reputation and credibility.

Nothing says more about a brand than correct spelling, grammar and punctuation!

To celebrate the launch of this succinct and easy-to-use (and possibly long-overdue) program, we’re offering it to you at the special price of $9.95 GST incl (RRP $19.95).

Visit www.onlinewritingtraining.com.au to register (if you aren’t already registered), and use the promotional code ‘owt010dbi’ to receive your discount when buying the program. The discount will show on the PayPal payment page.

And, as always, all feedback most welcome!

The power of headings and subheadings

Good layout improves readability. A dense, difficult to read piece can be simply and easily improved by the use of white spaces. You can gain white space by using headings and subheadings, short paragraphs and bulleted lists.

Placing subheadings through your work has the added bonus of communicating your messages at a glance. This is particularly important if you're writing for people who skimread on a tablet.

Do questions work as subheadings?
Some people use questions as subheadings. This technique is powerful if your question is specific and you ask a question which readers would like an answer to.

     Do you close the bathroom door even when you're the only one home?
     Psychology Today

On the other hand, poorly worded questions which are general and vague do not inspire people to read on.

     What do you do if you have a problem?

Statements as subheadings
Brief statements that sum up what the following paragraphs are about also make effective subheadings because the reader can tell at a glance what the section is about. Ideally, subheadings should be descriptive phrases using key terms, rather than bland single word subheadings that don't mean much.

Compare:

• Curfew
• Curfew imposed after unrest

Cater for different types of readers. Some people skimread headings first and others skip them completely. So don't treat your subheadings as part of your text. It's OK to repeat the subheading's message in the following sentence.

One-or-two word headings
Short phrases with specific words are usually better than one-or-two word subheadings, but many templates have one-or-two-word headings to break documents into major sections. These headings are often mandatory (e.g. Background, Recommendations).

Read your subheadings separately
Once you have finished writing, read your subheadings separately and see if they are telling your key messages. If they are, then your subheadings are doing a good job.

 

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Writing executive summaries

An executive summary gives you the guts of a document and makes you want to read the rest of the document to find out the detail. It is not an introduction so should not include much background information. Background can be referred to, but not covered in detail.

Writing an effective executive summary is a synthesising, rather than a writing, skill. Most people write the executive summary at the end when they have finished writing their document, some writers compile it as they are writing, and a few write it at the beginning to clarify their thinking.

If you write your executive summary first, you must refine it at the end to make sure your document flows and in case your thinking has changed slightly during the writing process.

One way of writing or rewriting an executive summary is to read through the document again and underline or highlight key words and phrases. There is nothing wrong with copying and pasting words into the executive summary for a first draft, but you must then paraphrase the copy.

Once you have finished writing and before the paper goes up the management chain, you should ask a subject-matter expert and someone who knows nothing about the topic to read your summary.

Having someone who knows nothing about the topic read a document is helpful because we have the ‘curse of knowledge’ about topics we are familiar with. For instance, a board paper I read recently asked the board to support a voluntary program, but did not describe the program, making the assumption that all directors would have heard of it.

Jargon is always an interesting question. All organisational guidelines I have ever read say ‘don’t use jargon’, but I seldom read reports with no jargon. Having acknowledged that, jargon should still be kept to a minimum in an executive summary and acronyms spelt out with the abbreviation in brackets – Australian Taxation Office (ATO).

Many reports are written in the third person, which automatically makes them more formal than other types of writing. The challenge is to find the right balance. Most writers find this tone intuitively, but some make the mistake of thinking that big words and abstract terms make them sound more intelligent. The reverse is true; all readers respect concise, direct language.

Writing tips

• Write one sentence stating the main message you wish to convey.
• Read through your paper and highlight all the key words and phrases.
• Group your ideas in logical order from the readers’ point of view.
• Summarise any material you have copied and pasted.
• Write in plain English — even for technical papers.
• Delete any superfluous information.
• Put yourself in the readers' shoes to see if the executive summary anticipates and answers the readers' questions.

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Reviewing and editing

Before you start editing someone’s writing, you need to be clear about the brief. The four types or stages of editing are:

• Reviewing
• Structural editing
• Copyediting
• Proofreading

If your brief is to proofread a document, you may check accuracy with the writer, but your focus will be on the little things, such as grammatical errors and typos, that detract from the document.

When you’re reviewing a document, you overlook the little things to make sure the document is logical and leaves no questions unanswered.

Your brief may be to do all types of edits for the same document in which case, you must start at the top with the review.

Reviewing

When you review a document, you need to place yourself in your readers' shoes and ask yourself if the report works:

• Will the readers be informed?
• Will the readers be able to make an informed decision?

Structural editing
With a structural edit, you need to find the bones of the report to see if the structure is appropriate. Often with this type of edit, you will cut and paste sections to change the order of the information.

Sometimes this edit will reveal gaps you need to consult the writer about. You need to take care with a structural edit that you do not change meaning.

Copyediting

When you are copyediting, your task is to improve the language and tone of a document and make sure it reads well. The paragraphs and sentences need to be clear and concise and the language appropriate.

Proofreading

Although you may have picked up some errors while copyediting, proofreading is a separate stage. If you have made comprehensive changes to the document, put it aside before proofreading it.

When proofreading, look for:

• Accuracy – correct referencing, typos etc.
• Styles – has the writer used the styles outlined in their style guide?
• Consistency at every level – headings, spacing, styles etc.
• Layout – does the report look visually attractive?

Although we seldom achieve perfect copy, a thorough edit improves clarity and readability. 

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